now browsing by category

Posted by: | Posted on:

Sex isn’t all: I am an asexual woman in a happy long-term relationship…..

This Valentine’s Day, my associate and I decided on doing something special for each other. Taking a break from our or else humdrum lives, we planned an intimate date that included some wine, good music, a candle-night dinner, and no six have I said before, we had indeed planned on making the day very special for each other, so a no-sex deal was my associate’s gift to me. Wondering why is I calling a night without any humid action a gift? Well, that’s since I am an asexual woman. And by that I mean I am not interested in having sex and have no sexual desires whatever.Before you bound the gun and tell me that’s bullshit and the reason why I abstain from having sex is because I am not into my man, let me tell you that I love him to the moon and back. We have been in a firm relationship for the past seven years, without sex becoming a deal breaker.Of course! , men like me exist. I do all to make my partner happy, except to have sex with him. As far as I am concerned, I am well-aware about my situation and don’t feel guilty about not making love to my mate. I know that I am different from the majority, but that doesn’t brand me as abnormal. In fact, I am as normal as any hot-blooded woman out therein all these years, I have given much thought to my aversion to sex and have come up with some valid explanations. You see, my family is pretty conservative when it comes to mingling with the members of the opposite sex. So, while growing up I was not allowed to befriend boys, talk to them, or go out with them. This might seem pretty normal since most Indian families don’t want their daughters socializing with boys, but in my case, things were a little different.My bedtime stories comprised of lectures of what happened to ‘bad’ girls who fell in love and did ‘dirty’ things beforemarriage. The idea of sex was so looked down upon in my family that I unintentionally began to despise it myself. As I grew up, I saw logic behind such tales, but the thought was so deep-rooted in my psyche that I found almost impossible to break free from it. I am a liberal woman and in a loving relationship, but I still can’t help but allow my past to cast a shadow over my present. Somewhere, deep inside my heart, the voices from my childhood still echo in my ears–calling sex a sin’s am not sure from what exactly the aversion stems from, but what I do know is that I can live without having sex and still be in a loving relationship.To be honest, over the past few years I have attempted getting intimate with my partner but failed rather miserably. So, after I became sure of my feelings, I sat down to have an honest chat with him. turned out that he had a hint and was amazing while dealing with it.So, if you harbor the same feelings as me but are confused about it, I would suggest that you have an honest conversation with your partner–it really helps. 

Posted by: | Posted on:

My boyfriend harassed me into being in a relationship with him…

Until last evening when I was on my way back home from office, I used to think that I had been in a happy year-long relationship that ended only recently. As the flashbacks of how my love story began started playing in my head, there was a strange realization that came to me. And it came from the most unexpected sources in the world–Vern Dawn and Alias Bhatt. No, they didn’t carjack me and put this thought in my head. And no, I haven’t been bribed by Dharma Productions to promote Baronet Kid Daphnia. What angered me was the fact that I started relating these lyrics with how my boyfriend, oops ex-boyfriend made me say yes to him. One month into knowing each other, I finally agreed to go out for a movie with him. I didn’t call it a date simply because I had no intentions of dating him so early on. Yes, we liked each other, but I wanted more time to get to know him first before finally getting into a relationship. Much against my will, our movie outing turned out to be a full-fledged date. Not because, even I thought it to be quite a sweet gesture, but I still said no and told him that I needed more time to make up my mind. However, his next move was even ‘sweeter’ and it made me say yes. He got out of the car, bent on his knees on the dimly-lit, empty road–which by the way was hardly a kilometer away from my house. I had no option but to comply because I was so scared, not of him, but of being seen with him at that hour on an isolated road. When it comes to commitments, I am like Selman Khan–main apnea asp kid phi nail suntan. So I took the relationship forward any way once I said yes and luckily, he turned out to be an amazing guy. So, no complaints there.se of any sparks that flew. But because of the fact that on our way back from the theater (around 12:30 a.m.), he decided to stop the car in the middle of the road–not to kiss me, but to ask me out

Just to make things clear, I am not blaming him for anything.  But, I think guys need to understand that a girl’s no means no. And just because she agrees to meet them really doesn’t mean she becomes their property. For most people around me my ex’s proposal was the most romantic gesture in the history of mankind. But listening to that song in which that stupid Bare was literally imposing himself on the girl made me feel like that girl. I felt like I wanted to take my own time to be able to trust him before saying yes instead of rushing into things. To be honest I am the kind of person who thought China Merely was a food-based song, so you know; I really don’t pay attention to or relate to lyrics in life.

Posted by: | Posted on:

Making GIGO Hasid wear a hijab for the Vogue Arabia cover is a really stupid move

Apart from being the girlfriend of ex-One Direction star Zayn Malik, Gigi Hadid is one of the most celebrated models in the world. In fact, 20-year-old Hadid has already been on 17 Vogue magazine covers, all unique in their own sense.

However, her latest photo shoot for the debut issue of Vogue Arabia has landed the model in a soup.

The cover of the magazine has Hadid posing with a crystal veil or a niqab covering half of her face. Now, this exotic-looking piece of clothing is worn in all forms by Arabic women, but it is, after all, patriarchy wrapped in tradition and religious norms. And we didn’t expect someone as empowered as Hadid to make a fashion statement out of it.

But, it is not just the cover that is inviting the ire of liberal-minded people. The inside layout of the magazine features the model in a pink-purple hijab and a full-sleeve ensemble–quite a paradox to her usual self.

What stands conspicuous here is that Hadid, though of half-Palestinian decent from her father’s side, is not a practicing Muslim. In fact, her mother Yolanda Hadid is of Dutch-American ancestry. Bestowed with a diverse heritage, there was absolutely no need for the model to sport the traditional headgear. A hijab or a veil, no matter what colour or embellishments it is decorated with, is not fashion. It is tradition that has been imposed on Muslim women for centuries. One that now needs to be rectified. And using a famous model like Hadid, who has quite a fan following worldwide to endorse it equates to promoting hijab culture.

Vogue Arabia, in a bid to appear glamorous and at par with its global contemporaries can very well make celebrated models pose for their covers, but burdening them with their culture is really not okay.

Posted by: | Posted on:

Karalla girl saves herself and 9 other girls from being forced into child marriage

How often have we criticized all evils that prevail in the Indian society over lunches, coffees, and tea breaks? But, have we ever showed the strength to instigate a change? Hardly ever. Well, we ought to take inspiration from the 15-year-old Karalla girl, who prevented 10 child marriages from taking place. On Sunday, the girl made a frantic call to Childlike, a helpline for children in distress and narrated her ordeal. A resident of Karuvarakkundue, an impoverished village in the state, she explained to the volunteers that she was being forced into an arranged marriage by her parents. She, on the other hand, wanted to study further.Fortunately, her call also saved the lives of nine others girls–all underage, who were to get married against their wishes. As soon as the volunteers got the frantic call, they swung into action.According to a report by The Hindu, Childlike officials rushed to the village and found nine more girls under the age of 18, were to be wedded in the coming weeks when schools close for summer vacation.The volunteers after gauging the situation contacted a local Pantheist member, who refused to intervene. Seeing no other alternative, they then went on to seek help from the local district administration and social welfare board.Surprisingly, the officials were able to talk some sense into the minds of the parents, who later cancelled the wedding plans. All thanks to the presence of mind and courage shown by the girl.” Initially, the parents resisted our move. We had to hold several counseling sessions to make them aware of the dangers of child marriage,” said Childlike district coordinator, An war Karakkadan, in an interview to Hindustan Times. “Some of the parents even told us that we would have to find a suitable match for their daughters once they were of marriageable age,” he continued.Despite government campaigns, child marriages still continue to plague our society. It’s imperative for the parents to understand that an early marriage of their underage daughter spells nothing but doom.

Posted by: | Posted on:

A GAO women’s group wants Sunny Leone’s ad to be removed over objectification of female body

Take any Indian advertisement in India, and the sheer misogyny and objectification of women will scream at you from a distance. Whether it’s an advertisement for a deodorant or one for a fruity beverage starring a popular Hollywood actress, women are blatantly portrayed as sex objects. Think more on the terms of double entendres and sexism! And now a women’s group in GAO has objected to a condom advertisement featuring Sunny Leone over objectification of the female body. The women’s group, Ranaragini, which is a wing of the Hindu Janajagruti Semite, has petitioned the GAO State Women’s Commission. They said that the advertising campaign in public places objectifying the feminine gender was proving embarrassing to women.” A different message is conveyed on account of this. This is a very ugly scene. We have received complaints about this from many women. We, hereby, kindly request you to remove these pictures,” the petition read. Nihau Guevara, who’s a member of the group, later spoke to reporters and said that the ads featuring Leone affixed on the state transport buses were objectionable and needed immediate removal. “Why should a government concern have such ads on them,” she said. She also asserted that the organization had no objection to contraceptive ads, but only to the objectification of women in such advertisements.GAO State Women’s Commission has issued notice in connection with the matter and its chairperson Vida Sheet Tonawanda has said that the matter will be probed.

We wonder when ad makers will actually realize that women are not props, or the fact that it’s actually possible to sell products without using sexist advertising tropes. What is this obsession with a woman’s body? Someone please enlighten us.